Completing the Stress Cycle

You’ve had a very demanding day at work, you get home and your kids are arguing and the house is a mess. You calm down the children and get them to bed, do a quick tidy-up, eat something and finally sit down in front of the TV. And relax… but your brain is still foggy, your heart is racing, you can’t switch off. You go to bed, replaying the day’s events and thinking about what you must do tomorrow. You struggle to sleep and when you finally do it feels like 10 minutes until your alarm. Sound familiar? You may be stuck in the pressures of the stress cycle.

Modern-day demands often mean that we are left juggling multiple priorities – a full-time job, family responsibilities, housework and finances; the list seems never-ending. All these small stressors can build up and leave us feeling exhausted, ill and unmotivated. So, what can we do to help ourselves cope with the increasing pressures of everyday life?

The Evolution of the Stress Cycle

Let’s go back

Way back – to when we were primitive beings, foraging and hunting for our food and pretty much just surviving every day. We’re walking along when suddenly we’re faced with a lion looking for its next meal. Your brain perceives the threat and activates your sympathetic nervous system – fight or flight. Your heart rate increases, blood rushes to your muscles, adrenaline is released and you’re off – running for your life. You run as fast as you can to the nearby village, a friendly neighbour opens their door and you run straight in, slamming the door behind you. You’ve done it, you’ve escaped, you’re safe. Cue jumping, hugging and celebrations.

Your heart rate returns to normal, your breathing slows, your brain recognises you’ve escaped and you’re now safe with someone you trust.

Your body is free to complete the stress cycle.

Just escaping our stressors – finishing a bad day at work, switching off your online banking, leaving the busy supermarket – doesn’t mean the stress it causes goes away. The stress is stored in your body unless the cycle is complete, and your brain and body know you are now safe. The build-up of stress in the body makes us tired, ill and unable to cope as well with daily life.

Being well and able to handle stress doesn’t mean we should all be walking around in a state of calm, never reacting to situations and being generally ‘zen’. But managing your stress levels enables you to move in and out of stressful situations with ease, without it affecting your health.

Ensuring our Bodies are Completing the Stress Cycle

Here are the top tools your body needs to keep stress levels in our body at a healthy level:

Move your body: Daily exercise is the number one way to let your body know you’re escaping the stressor. This doesn’t mean you have to spend hours at the gym, just a brisk walk, a dance around the living room, a quick swim in your local pool or a bike ride around the park will increase your mental and physical wellbeing. Aim for 20 to 60 minutes of movement per day.

Breathe: Whilst a stressor activates your sympathetic nervous system, deep slow breaths activate your parasympathetic nervous system, which carries signals to your body that you can relax.
A simple exercise is to breathe in for a slow count of five, hold that breath for five, and then exhale to a slow count of ten. Pause for another count of five and do that three times. That’s just one minute out of your day.

Social Interaction: In their book ‘Burnout: The Secret To Unlocking The Stress Cycle’, Emily and Amelia Nagoski say: “Casual but friendly social interaction is the first external sign that the world is a safe place”. Just a quick compliment to a colleague or a “Have a nice day!” in Starbucks will reassure your brain that the world is a safe place.

Laughter: A deep, belly laugh can help to regulate our emotions and build social bonds. Even just remembering a funny situation or encounter can help.

Connect with loved ones: A loving, warm hug is a sure-fire way to let your brain know that you’re safe.

Cry: We’ve all been there – we just make it through the door before the floodgates open and the next thing we know we’re sobbing uncontrollably. A good cry releases oxytocin and endorphins, which are feelgood chemicals known to ease both physical and emotional pain.

Do something creative: Getting creative helps you return to the present moment and process your emotions in a healthy way. Colouring books, journalling, painting, knitting, photography, gardening and cooking are all great ways to unleash your creative side.

Remember, whilst you’re busy managing the daily stressors your body is trying to manage the stress itself. Completing the stress cycle helps this along and avoids a build-up of stored stress in your body. Be kind to yourself and give your body all the resources it needs to keep you well.